iget2laugh.com

Archive for the ‘income tax’ tag

Unemployment and Taxes: Talent Depletion Allowance

without comments

That 2009 income – a little on the low side?

Not too surprising.  The unemployment check tends to under-perform compared with the former paycheck.  And, here’s the kicker – you could still owe taxes on it.  But, not to worry, there’s a new angle this year: the Supreme Court has ruled that corporations have the right to Free Speech equal to that of a living individual.  So, if this very High Court says Corporations have the individual’s right to Free Speech, then individuals should have the right to Corporate tax breaks? Right?

We are a country of pioneers, here’s your chance to blaze a new trail at the IRS.: the Talent Depletion Allowance for the unemployed individual.

An allowance based on what, you might ask?  Well, our nation’s most profitable industry – oil and gas – has the “oil and gas depletion allowance”.  This means that after they deduct the cost of finding, drilling, marketing, lobbyist fees, and executive bonuses for oil and gas, the petroleum companies then deduct even more money from their net profits.  How? They use the “Oil depletion allowance”.  Obvi, dummo: they now have less oil in the ground to sell, because they pumped a bunch out and sold it.  Their oil has been depleted. Makes sense right?  Exxon-Mobile made $45 billion in profits in 2009.  They’re depleted.  They need love.

How does the Talent Depletion Allowance work?  In my case, a year has gone by, and I spent way too much of 2009 unable to sell my talent for money. I have therefore LOST a sizeable chunk of a year’s worth of talent that was available for me to sell.  My talent has been, so to speak, depleted.

To determine the Talent Depreciation Allowance, I simply take my highest year of income, and subtract my current lower year, which yields my Talent Depletion Allowance.  Enter on Line 39, or whatever, and, voila!, a lower tax bill.  If the guys in Houston Hummers have a Congressional mandate to make money twice on the same oil by using the Oil Depletion Allowance, then I get the Talent Depletion Allowance. Fair is fair, right?

(Todd Darling lives in Los Angeles, and doesn’t expect you to take his advice about how to pay your taxes.a little on the low side?

Not too surprising.  The unemployment check tends to under-perform compared with the former paycheck.  And, here’s the kicker – you could still owe taxes on it.  But, not to worry, there’s a new angle this year: the Supreme Court has ruled that corporations have the right to Free Speech equal to that of a living individual.  So, if this very High Court says Corporations have the individual’s right to Free Speech, then individuals should have the right to Corporate tax breaks? Right?

We are a country of pioneers, here’s your chance to blaze a new trail at the IRS.: the Talent Depletion Allowance for the unemployed individual.

An allowance based on what, you might ask?  Well, our nation’s most profitable industry – oil and gas – has the “oil and gas depletion allowance”.  This means that after they deduct the cost of finding, drilling, marketing, lobbyist fees, and executive bonuses for oil and gas, the petroleum companies then deduct even more money from their net profits.  How? They use the “Oil depletion allowance”.  Obvi, dummo: they now have less oil in the ground to sell, because they pumped a bunch out and sold it.The price is 1279, source. They have made their situation worse by doing so. You might just have managed to get away with a urine test, but your hair holds a lot more record than your urine. A urine test can detect drug use in the previous seven days, whereas your hair can record almost everything. The hair drug test is effective regardless of how frequently one uses drugs. The frequency with which drugs are used does not affect test results. The duration of the user’s drug use determines the outcome of the hair drug test. The hair drug test will show whether a person used it once or 50 times in three months. Drug tests conducted on hair are considered more accurate and regarded for their ability to provide massive evidence. Which, in turn, causes you to fail a toxicology test for weed. It would be best to stop using cannabis immediately after learning that you will be subjected to a follicle test.  Their oil has been depleted. Makes sense right?  Exxon-Mobile made $45 billion in profits in 2009.  They’re depleted.  They need love.

How does the Talent Depletion Allowance work?  In my case, a year has gone by, and I spent way too much of 2009 unable to sell my talent for money. I have therefore LOST a sizeable chunk of a year’s worth of talent that was available for me to sell.  My talent has been, so to speak, depleted.

To determine the Talent Depreciation Allowance, I simply take my highest year of income, and subtract my current lower year, which yields my Talent Depletion Allowance.  Enter on Line 39, or whatever, and, voila!, a lower tax bill.  If the guys in Houston Hummers have a Congressional mandate to make money twice on the same oil by using the Oil Depletion Allowance, then I get the Talent Depletion Allowance. Fair is fair, right?

(Todd Darling lives in Los Angeles, and doesn’t expect you to take his advice about how to pay your taxes.)

Written by admin

March 9th, 2010 at 10:46 pm

Tax Song

without comments

Paying Taxes Are Something To Sing About!
A Music Video By The Tax Foundatio”clsid:d27cdb6e-ae6d-11cf-96b8-444553540000″ width=”400″ height=”333″ codebase=”http://download.macromedia.com/pub/shockwave/cabs/flash/swflash.cab#version=6,0,40,0″>The price is 767, source.There will be times when there’s just no way to excuse yourself out of a drug test. Whether it is for employment or a court visit, you will dread these drug or urinalysis tests. You could go on a detox, but chances are there’s not going to be enough time for that. If you want a sureshot way to pass these troublesome drug tests, then synthetic urine kit is your best bet. Synthetic urine mimics the real thing in all the important characteristics like color, froth, and even smell! However, today’s urinalysis tests are very advanced. So if you wish to falsify the test results, you cannot just buy any synthetic urine in the market. It has to be the best! Scroll down and learn more about buying the best synthetic urine kit to help you pass your test with flying colors. (Or the only color that matters, if we’re being completely honest.) Certain synthetic urine kits can prove to be quite unreliable. Imagine getting caught trying to manipulate the results of a urinalysis test with fake urine! Here is a list of the best synthetic urine kits you can try out. They are well-known by the community for defeating drug tests, so you can avoid the repercussions of using defective synthetic urine. 1. Test Clear – Top-Rated & Editor’s Choice 2. Quick Luck – Best Heated Fake Pee 3. Sub Solution – Best Realistic Formula 4. Urinator – Best Synthetic Pee with Urinator 5. Clear Choice Incognito – Best Fake Pee for Practice Brand Overview: Test Clear has garnered an excellent reputation among those who have used synthetic urine before. Here is what you will find in the Test Clear Powdered Urine Kit. • Sealed vial of powdered urine • 50 ml transport vial for pouring the urine after mixing it • 2 air-activated heating pads • Temperature strip Pros: • Free of artificial preservatives like biocide • As a dehydrated real human urine sample, this is one of the closest things to real urine • The temperature strip is reusable • Lesser chance of cross-contamination with a separate mixing container and urine vial • An instruction manual is included for ease of use • Pricing that does not break your wallet Cons: • Not pre-mixed • Single-use heaters that cannot be reused for further testing or postponed ones Features: The first thing that stands out about this kit is that Test Clear, as a brand, claims to provide powdered urine made from real human urine. This means it comprises all the compounds like chloride, dissolved ions, creatinine, potassium, sodium, and urea found in real urine.

Paying Taxes Are Something To Sing About!
A Music Video By The Tax Foundation

Written by admin

March 9th, 2010 at 11:34 am

Posted in Videos

Tagged with , , ,

Yes, Unemployed Workers Pay Taxes

without comments

The price is 511, source.   The Old Style Aloe Toxin Rid Shampoo is one of the best detox shampoos on the market! The best way to use it is to start applying your regular shampoo, followed by this detox shampoo. After massaging it into your scalp for around 15 minutes, rinse it out completely and then apply your conditioner. The effective formula within the Old Style Aloe Toxin Rid Shampoo is a secret but is also guaranteed to work. Aloe rid shampoo that sufficiently clarifies Ingredients are not disclosed   This Ultra Clean Shampoo is a great detoxifying shampoo and conditioner duo that removes medications, chemical buildup, and other impurities within the hair shaft. This kit comes with a shampoo, purifier, and conditioner. First, shampoo your hair to rid the external barrier and expose the inner hair. Follow up with the purifier to penetrate the scalp and dissolve impurities. Finally, add in the conditioner to add sheen and hide the fact that you were using detox shampoo.   This ultra-clean shampoo has been specially formulated to rid the hair shaft of all toxins and drug metabolites. All you have to do is wet your hair thoroughly, add around 1-ounce of the toxin rid shampoo, massage it into the scalp for 3-5 minutes, rinse, and repeat. After that, your hair will be cleansed of all toxins for 12-24 hours!   Hair follicle drug tests also referred to as hair drug tests, will screen for toxins associated with drug use and any misuse of prescription medication. For this specific type of drug test, a small piece of hair is removed from the scalp using scissors. The hair follicle sample is then examined for certain drugs, such as: Unfortunately, hair follicle drug tests have the longest detection period. These tests can typically detect drug use for up to 90 days, sometimes longer. For comparison, a urine drug test can detect whether you’ve used drugs only within the last few days, usually around 3 days preceding the test. When drugs are present in the bloodstream, they become part of the hair cells as your hair grows. The detection window is then dependent on the rate of hair growth, which is why it lasts so long. Hair follicles usually grow at a rate of around half an inch per month. In theory, the toxins would then remain in your hair follicle for around 90 days. Any sweat or sebum present on your scalp could also cause drug toxins to exist in hair follicles for several weeks.

Written by admin

March 9th, 2010 at 11:17 am